a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
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