I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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