ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize