I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
