so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
whose parrot is this?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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