You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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