a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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