At least make sure they are 18
Why
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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