I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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