I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
