just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
