Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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