I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize