Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
is it fun? or sober?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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