did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Randomize
