Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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