I think scott just propositioned me for sex
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
