you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
