period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
