Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize