Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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