i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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