dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
