well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
