Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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