I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
