Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
