the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize