the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
