Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
