so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
