Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
