I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
i now understand why vodka
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Randomize