no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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