I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
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