what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
