He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
