i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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