you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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