from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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