i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
We left an ass print on the piano.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize