On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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