Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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