Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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