Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
