Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Randomize
