i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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