I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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