Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
