dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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