In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
