Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
